The Bold and Beautiful......not

there was this show called the bold and beautiful, quite an old show i think, but never mind, i'm not blogging about the show.

i'm going to blog about the opposite of the title. ok, not totally opposite la, not the coward and ugly. so then there was the Bold and Beautiful (B and B), and then came the Lazy and Lame (L and L). that's me. T____T obviously, i won't put that up as the title, because it's just too sad hahaha

Lazy is because i haven't blog for a week already. it's not like i was ssssooooooo busy till no time to blog... actually i'm quite busy la, sleeping, playing WoW, sleeping, studying and practising for OSCE, sleeping, and all the small things in between like eat, grocery shopping and going bathroom. lol. yea, my life's very interesting. not to mention zhi yi told me that i can't go out anymore like to shopping malls and all, because i need to get more serious and stressed for the exam. made me guilty about thinking of going out. and then when kai aun asked me just now: got go out or not? not sien meh stay at home all the time? what was I suppose to say....T_____T..... i was crying inside, sniff, sniff LOL

ya, kai aun came to my place just now to use the internet to check some urgent stuff. not because he miss me, hmmmppphhhfffttttt. and some more i nearly fell asleep edi before he came. and after he left, now i don't feel like sleeping edi, because i'm all excited from his visit, lol, just joking. more like i'm in a dilemma, a stupid 1: i should go sleep, tomorrow got csu practise again, but i must read first, or what about i sleep first and read it in the morning? but what if i can't wake up early to read?

so after wasting my time debating back and forth, i'm here, not studying, but blogging. =.=" i'm so amazing. hahaha.

and the LAME part. actually i didn't want to be lazy and leave my blog not updated for a week. i actually had an idea of what to blog about a few days ago. granted i thought it was quite creative and funny, something i thought of before i fell asleep hahahaha. it was a conversation between 2 bloodsucking creatures in my room (who were actually mosquitoes) about how boring that i was the only 1 at my apartment, so no1 else to suck blood from. and i was going to entitle it NEW BLOOD, after the new twilight saga, new moon (or in malay-translated book i saw in popular, BULAN BARU).

then the day after, i was lazy to blog, and lost the oomph about my supposedly brilliant idea. and 1 day later i thought it was lame. =.=. so i didnt blog about it. lol. and what's with the hoohaa about this twilight saga anyway? i found something even lamer than myself, and that's how every1(or rather the majority female population) is crazy over edward cullen.

i mean, all he needs to do is to look emo like this. and say some emo stuff like:
I don't want to be a monster....

(picture taken from http://www.flickr.com/photos/mademoizellenguyen/3377678443/sizes/m/)

and all the girls will cry/ faint/get emo themselves. look, i mean this person has even uploaded a crystal clear, big picture of his face as her laptop wallpaper(i assume it's a girl). it's not that i hate him, haha, but well, getting so hyped about a movie mainly because the actor is good looking is just kinda absurd to me. and no, i havent watch the twilight saga.

ok, i shall be lazy no longer... ugh, i'll try. and i gotta go now, get my meager sleep and wake up early tomorrow to study my csu for the practise tomorrow or zhi yi is going to murder me.

Walk Walk

it's december. yea i know my previous entry was also posted in december, but because i had a lot to talk in that entry, i forgot to mention anything about being in the month of december.

so then! the last month of the year. somehow i feel like i'm getting old. december is the month i feel old, january is when i feel fresh and getting excited about the years ahead. birthday is when....i don't feel much hahaha. i feel december is the time when u should spend a little time to reflect on the year, what happened during the last 11 months, and what we can use to make ourselves a better person.

frankly, this year has been full of different happenings. this year and last year as well. before that mostly i've only met with academic challanges, maybe some minor friends/family quarrels and there was the archery training as well.

then there was college and medical school. college was one of the most enjoyable time, due to the fact that i broke free from the watch of my strict parents, the excitement of being independent, meeting lots of new people and of course, falling in love. then came med school. i can say i'm struggling quite a lot in med school, trying my best cope with what seems to me the hardest thing to study at the moment T_____T. perhaps it was because it's really tough, or because i don't like it, or because i cant remember things i dont like, or maybe it was a combination of all 3. also last year i went through multiple, serious, to the point of breaking up quarrels with ji hang, and then there was the pain of losing my hamster. i remember taking the train to titiwangsa every morning to bring my hamster to the veterinary clinic for its antibiotic shots as soon as it opens and rushing back for classes for a whole week. not to mention i spent around RM300 for it only to see it die at the end. i remember crying my eyes out outside the clinic the day it died (some more it was me who decided to euthanise it when i saw it suffering so much).

that was a really difficult time for me. i know, it's just a hamster, and i had lost a lot of pets already, but most of the other pets died in a sudden way (eg my cat got killed by neighbour dogs, my dog eating trash n got poisoned). this hamster was the one i spent my time carefully cleaning the cage, feeding it food, played with, who bite me multiple times.... and then to spend so much time, effort and money only to see it die was very stressful. if u cant understand, then don't, but don't laugh, thinking:" it's just a hamster, she's so pathetic", because it is not nice. =.=

that was then. this year came more challenges. serious family health problems, ji hang leaving to uk, lost of an uncle, cut off by a close friend, studies n exam (and this osce T__T). but you know, what doesn't break you only makes u stronger. i guess as time passes, there'll be more n more challenges. oh well, till then.

but not all is dark this year. i've made new friends ^_^. good friends, people who despite only knowing me for a few months, were willing to help me in difficult times. and i havent done much for them to actually deserve their help. i'll be sad to part with them.

yesterday n today, zhi yi and woon wee came to help me with my csu. they have my utmost gratitude. jian ming also came today. i feel a bit pai seh la, being watched when practising. truth to be told, i get very nervous when a few people are watching me, but not when i'm being watched by lots of people eg during debate/public speaking(which i've participated in during secondary school). jian ming told me: in clinical school later, u'll also be in small group and people will be watching you. the doctors will sure scold you all the time 1. true, true, so i should try to be more confident/less nervous/thick skinned when being watched/scolded.

oh and i've finally cleaned my room. now it looks like how it was before the tornado(eos 5) hit it. no more notes on the floor and bed. yay! i'm so proud of myself!!!

also, this is my 100th entry on my blog!! *celebration sound* everybody say yeah! lol. not to forget, today is Chong Yiau Hoong's 22nd birthday!! happy birthday!! celebration sound again* you're 1 year older and wiser today!!! yiau hoong is one of the funniest people i've met, with his pg-13 and 18sx jokes, he never fails to crack me up, haha.

and because this entry has been so serious/boring/emo (however u want to look at it), i'll end it with something funny: ants love to eat sweet, sugary stuff. but what is going to happen to an ant that has diabetes? :(

...... eh! i thought this up by myself just for you ok! so at least force a laugh even if you actually go-----> =.=". i'm sorry i'm so lame. and does ants even have liver???

All sorts 2

Now where do i start... lots of things have been going on lately, so much so that i slept the whole day today to regain back some energy.... kai aun is going to scold me again for sleeping all the time lol.

my mind is jumbled with lots of thoughts right now, i don't know how to sort it out. so then maybe by blogging here, it'll help me be at peace with my thoughts for a while.

I'll start with the Malacca trip on Wednesday. went with the 'SAD' guys namely zen, kai aun, jian ming, yiau hoong, zhi yi, woon wee and teddy. was a great trip. reached malacca at around lunch time and ate satay for lunch.

me and the SAD guys! (except wei ming lol)

there were other batchmates who went to malacca on that day too. this is all those who were in malacca:

so many of us haha, plus jebby as well, who were not in the picture because she was the photographer. thanks jebby :)

after a not-so-filling lunch of satay (how do u get full on satay??? unless u spend really a lot lol), we went to visit the famous A Famosa.


Woon Wee, me and teddy outside the A Famosa. u can tell it's a hot afternoon by the look of woon wee's displeasure of having to pose under the sun hahahaha. A Famosa is a fort built by the Portugese against any intruders from the Strait of Malacca. It is armed with cannons such as this:


this is one of the A Famosa cannons!! oh wait.... i must be a little mistaken. this is yiau hoong's big cannon! and that's zen looking delighted at touching yiau hoong's cannon. LOL

then inside the fort itself were many amazing plates with dutch inscription on it. it was a church as well i think. really amazing. this is one of the plates. notice the old wall behind it :O!!



JENG JENG JENG... now i present to u the captains and generals that were in great discussion in the fort!! this great scene was captured by none other than yours truly, moi.

from left to right: Coporal Alphonso Yiau Hoong, General JM Marque, Second-in-command Colombus Zhi Yi, Captain-General QueQue Woon Wee, Lieutenant Zen, Coporal Alexander Teddy, Knight-Lieutenant Ebezekiel Kai Aun.

Captain-General Queque Woon Wee: My dear General! I've received grave news indeed that the Dutch are planning to attack this fort in a few days time. Pray, tell me what you've line up for our defense.

General JM Marque: There will be a big storm soon. Rain, thunder and lightning will rain upon us and the enemy. This is an advantage to us as the enemy are coming on ships. I suggest we built more cannons etc etc.....

Lieutenant Zen: what??!!! it's going to rain soon?

Coporal Alexander Teddy: i don't think it's going to rain kua.... look, it's so hot now.

Second-in-command Columbus Zhi Yi: *this is going no where, rain or not, it doesn't matter, i have an umbrella on my shoulders*

Knight-Lieutenant Kai Aun: It's raining soon? I better open my umbrella. *clicks, umbrella opened*

Coporal Alphonso Yiau Hoong: Sigh... this is so boring, i want to go back home, kimochi,kimochi
(whatever that means lol, kimochi seems to be the coporal's favourite word)

while they were in deep discussion, i was walking around enjoying the view, taking photos with teddy's camera, lol. after A Famosa we walked to the Famous Jonker Street. on the way, we passed by Christ Church Malacca:

Me and kai aun. was really hot, very hard to smile properly when the sun's right on my face. after walking some more we reached:

Jonker Street!! Jian ming was telling us about this nice shop selling cendol. so we were walking around looking for it. after walking a whole round, we found the shop!!! it was right at the beginning..... lol, thanks jian ming for the exercise hahaha.

the cendol was really yummy! not too sweet, much to my liking. after that we walked around and tried the famous chicken rice balls, where the rice were moulded into balls and served with chicken. nothing special lol, the rice was a bit harder than your normal chicken rice, due to the moulding.

night came and we had dinner at a nyonya restaurant. christine, a m207 malacca-ian came with her mother and some of our batchmates. christine's mum paid for our dinner, thank you very much. :)


after dinner we went to eat satay celup, hahaha, eat eat and eat. satay celup is like where u dip sticks of fishballs/prawns/meat/squids into a boiling pot of satay sauce and wait till it's cook. then u eat it. Thus ends the malacca trip.

Next day was the klang trip. zen being a klang-ian, was really enthusiatic about the trip. most of us were just tired after the malacca trip, hahaha. we were joined by jian ren, guan meng, shin ying and kelvin for the klang trip.

group photo at zen's house. jian ren was the photographer.

for lunch, we went to eat klang's bah kut teh. was quite nice. then we went to eat klang's cendol. wasn't that nice, it was really extremely too sweet. much prefered malacca's 1. but zen being a klang-ian... was full of praises for the cendol and said the malacca 1 was... sour. =.="

after that we went aeon, the biggest shopping complex in klang. after walking around some of us went to watch 2012 at the cinema, while 5 of us decided to rest a bit and went zen's house. then we meet up for a late dinner of steamboat.

lots of jokes that night, hahaha. and thus was the end of the 2 days trip. the next day was a day we all dread. the results day. i remember i was so nervous it was hard to eat my lunch T__T. feeling scared, i went to get the results all by myself, not wanting to meet any friends at that moment. took the results and went to one of the pbl room to open it. and.............. well, thankfully i passed my theory, but alas, got a C-, a grade short of pass, for my OSCE. feeling a little relieved about my theory but unhappy about my OSCE, i decided not to meet any of my friends, to avoid them from asking me about my results. but then i thought: since a few month ago, i've been close to the SAD gang. they will undoubtly want to know about my results. i grimaced at the thought of telling them about my failed osce. it was inevitable though. so i called zhi yi to pay him the petrol money and toll for the 2 days, waiting for him to ask me about my results.

but in a few seconds which my calls got through, the battery ran out. i contemplated on my next move. to find my friends and pay zhi yi there, after getting asked about my results? or should i go back and recharge my phone, not meeting them. being courageless to face them, i decided to go back home. called my dad to tell him about the results, then called zhi yi to continue the cut conversation. since i didnt want to go out, he was kind enough to come over. i paid the petrol money and we talked a bit. it help me eased my unhappiness a little.

then kai aun called me. talked about the results a bit, then... he asked me if i've seen someone close to the gang. cos he was missing. i was rather amused and after a while told him that zhi yi was at my place. and kai aun said i kidnapped him...... =.=" and that they are going to come and rescue him.... after dinner. =.=" and so he asked me out for dinner with zen, woon wee, teik yew and zen's bro n sis.

and so i met up with them for dinner. by this time everyone was saying i kidnapped zhi yi, tie him up and held him at knife-point. =.=" (for what i also don't know lol). it didn't help that the first thing zhi yi said, to woon wee, when we arrived at the dinner place was: woon wee! i'm still alive!

so that's what been going on with my life lately. a few of the SAD guys are helping me for my OSCE T___T i'm so thankful to them. this tuesday, i'm supposed to have a practise session with zhi yi and woon wee. i've only been friends with them for a few months, i can't believe they're so nice to help me out already. much in contrast to someone i know, who i considered my close friends of 2 years.

this OSCE resit, i'm going to pass it, for sure. that day on the 2nd day of my osce, i remembered how terribly i performed. i was nervous, anxious and stressed to the point of panicking in the room. i knew i've could've done much better, but what's done it's done. it's in the past, i can only go forward.

(all pictures taken from Teddy Teo's facebook, with verbal consent from him during the trip :P)

Everyone's a winner

Saw a 'motivational poster' a few days ago. it says:

"AIM TO BE FIRST.
Being second just means you're first in a long line of losers."

......whatever happened to everyone's a winner? after all, there can only be one spot for first, and it doesn't mean if you're not first, you're a loser. i guess this poster was only meant for those ultra-super-kiasu-person, the 1 that die-die also must not lose. =.="

some 'motivation' indeed. i think it does more harm than good. pfffffttt, stupid poster.

All sorts

I'm calm. at least i appear to be calm. but underneath this mask, lies uncertainties, uncertainties that could only be resolve in 6 days time. my exam results. frankly i just hope i pass, nothing more. i dont want to resit and subject myself to the mental torture again.

leaving exams results aside for the moment.... the last 2 days have been used to relax. and i really mean relax and rest. right after exams most of my friends went out to de-stress/have fun. initially i was going to follow them, but because i was still brooding over how badly i felt i performed for the osce that day, i declined their kind invitations. Thanks kai aun, and guan meng for asking me out, i appreciated it. :)

so then i took the time to have some 'me' time. truthfully, i have two sides to myself. i shall call them A and B.

A: loud and noisy, can laugh really loud, very unlady-like, not gentle at all, love teasing my friends, likes to go out, jokes around. hahaha, i'm sure most of my friends have seen this side of me.

B: now this side is a little more in the dark. probably only ji hang, and a few good friends, eg ming-yi, would have seen this side of me. the sensitive, quiet, likes staring into space, appreciates some alone time now and then, likes to go out with only 1 or 2 people, more serious, loves listening to music.

last few days, i was in my B element. i can spend more than 1 hour not doing anything but just sit on my bed, listening to my ipod and think about things... lots of things. reading manga and going online. i feel a bit more calm this way.

.....intermission....... ji hang is calling me XD........

ah, hehe, just got a call for ji hang. talked for 29 mins XD... aww, i miss him. he said sorry for not contacting me lately and stuffs, and we just chat about our current happenings and stuffs. it's always good to hear from him :), albeit, i dont need him to call me everyday or nearly everyday. he calls me once a week or so, and then we'll just take the time to catch up and stuff. i use to get angry when he doesnt calls me for more than 3 days, but now, i guess i don't really mind all those stuff anymore. we go on with our lifes, busy as they are, and when he's free enough to take a breather, he'll call me, and then we'll chat. in between that, i think of him all the time. i guess i'm becoming less dependent on him now.

and since kai aun is always asking me about ji hang..... and how he looks like... i'll put in a picture of him here :)

awww, isn't he the cutest XD. hahahaha, ok anyways, i'm straying from the boring topic of the two sides of me. sorry to bored u some more haha. so then i think most people would've seen my A side, but not many people would know of my B side. i guess that's because around a lot people, side A tends to show up more, and side B only shows when i'm with a person i feel close to and comfortable with, and also when i'm alone by myself.

ok, enough about that. i shall tell you what i did yesterday morning-afternoon. 11am to 1.45pm. i was at vista B's badminton room playing badminton with some friends. they were zen, zhi yi, woon wee, jian ming, adam, george, david and then at the last half and hour, kai aun.

it was very fun :). i havent played badminton in 3 years i think. last was at college. was pretty rusty at first, but after a few rounds of warm up, got my feel back :). but of course since i haven't been training at all, my stamina was pretty short, lacking power as well. but i can say i played pretty well, especially during the first 1 hour. could catch the shuttlecock pretty well, and hit back with a sharp and fast shot. bwahahaha, i'm patting my own back, but never mind. XD. can't really smash :(, not enough power. and can't catch those fast smash by jian ming/david/kai aun. booo, cant u go easier on a girl. hahahaha, joking, please just play normally, no need to go easy on me. :D (and since kai aun came so late, i was already tired after 2 hours of playing, so when i played against him, i feel like a jelly, power -ve already, can't play well. and he plays tennis as well, so he did smashed me kao..... T____T)

zen wasn't too bad too! i always thought he was the taufu-type, hahahahaha. :P. well, all of them were good players then. maybe i was the worst T___T (hopefully not). anyways, today i woke up with..... muscle aches all over my body =.=". this is what happened when u havent played for 3 years, and suddenly decides to run all over the court again.

ok, till next time, ardios. hope i recover from my muscles aches soon T__T.